Write Club 5
Prompt: The end of the world
Had Paige been paying attention as she ran helter-skelter through the house, she might have taken note of the TV news broadcast that was playing on the TV sets in the living room and kitchen.
“Satellite telescopes have now confirmed that the meteor that is being tracked is indeed what scientists have dubbed a ‘planet killer.’” The anchorman stared unflinchingly into the camera, his voice steady and heavy with gravitas.
Paige found the hairbrush she had been looking for, but spared only a little thought for why it had ended up in the living room rather than the bathroom, and no thought at all for the tiny tooth marks on it. A testament to her haste.
She walked past the kitchen TV without sparing a glance for the aging scientist who shared a split-screen with the grave anchorman. “We have measured the asteroid and estimate that it is roughly six times as large as the meteor believed to have ended the reign of the dinosaurs, some sixty-five million years ago.”
The anchorman’s face, if possible, became even stonier. “And this asteroid is heading towards Earth?”
“There is some question as to whether Earth’s orbit will bring it into the path of the Asteroid. As the meteor passes Jupiter, its course will be affected by that planet’s gravity. There is no way to tell at the moment.”
Paige bee-lined for the bathroom, brush gripped tightly in her hand, the television no more than a droning in the background. She reached the bathroom and stepped in front of the mirror. She smoothed her prom dress down with one hand and lifted the brush.
A dark shadow passed over the sun. Birds fell silent as if the dark shape covering the sun cast not a shadow, but a blanket of dread apprehension. Paige’s hand froze in the act of lifting the hairbrush.
Centered between her eyes like a Hindu beauty mark was a large, red pimple.
“A ZIT!!!”
Her scream sent the birds back into flight, so loud that the cloud passed over the sun as if chased away by the shrill cry, returning warm sunlight to the neighborhood.
Paige’s mother sighed without looking up from her newspaper. “Paige, it’s not the end of the world….”
4 comments:
Did the asteroid miss? I was confused as to if the shadow passing over the sun was the asteroid or just a cloud.
The timing was great with the feeling of impending doom and her discovery of the zit. Many sixteen year old girls would find an ill placed zit on Prom Night to be one of the worst things to occur in their lives.
It makes me wonder: if Paige had learned about the impending asteroid, would she still throw a tantrum because her date was late to pick her up? Would her reaction to the asteroid be less of a "oh my god, the world's ending" and more of a "Well now this just ruins everything!"?
I loved the imagery of the newscast. I imagined some kind of Walter Cronkite with a bushy mustache and over-sized glasses talking about an impending meteor before passing it off to Chet with the Sports. Additionally, I loved the interview with the scientist, which of course gave me images of the Scientist as Dr. Kerensky from the Jagaroth episode of Dr. Who (City of death).
The newscast and interview with the scientist went off as I'd planned then :)
As to the meteor, it was just passing the orbit of Jupiter (with the scientists waiting to see if the gravity of the gas giant would alter its course enough to make it miss or not), so we don't really know if it will hit or miss.
But despite its distance, you were meant to feel that the doom was impending when the cloud covers the sun. I wanted to wait until the last moment to reveal that the end of the world was a shiny red dot on someone's face.
If the asteroid was right over head and hurtling down on her, Paige probably would have just been pissed that they canceled the prom ;)
This was pretty funny and enjoyable :)
I wouldn't have gotten that it was a Foxtrot-inspired piece though unless you had mentioned something. Now that I know I can totally see the connection!
I'm something of an anxious reader, and so the mix of literal world-ending events and evening-ruining events felt uncomfortable at times. To see that the end of the world was truly impending, and actively doomful, I was a tad distracted from the narrative because I wanted the characters to deal with the real doom.
Of course the point is Paige is too caught up in her own world to do that. :)
kek, that is a funny short story I could imagine a prissy popular girl on prom day getting ready and actually doing that, being more worried over looks then anything else that is going on.
i could imagine the shrillness of her voice by your description of the birds flying away, and the cloud moving.
I didn't think the shadow was the meteor, simply because the news said they were waiting for it to pass by jupiter.
other then that i laughed when i read this, it was an enjoyable read.
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